Parenting Archives - Page 16 of 16

Tips for Preparation and Recovery After a C Section

November 22, 2015 by Ashley Leave a Comment

(Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional, only a mother sharing her experience. Everyone reacts differently to child birth and a c section so consult with your doctor if you have any questions.)

When I got pregnant the first time over seven years ago I admit that I did not know what I was getting myself into. I was not ready for a child and because of that the medical attention that I received was not the best. My first pregnancy was easy and for that I am very thankful, but god do I wish that I had been smarter about many of my decisions going into things. I did not know what my options were and I did not real research as far as the pregnancy went.

If I had a pregnancy with complications I would have been screwed because I had a terrible doctor (never just go with the first doctor that accepts your health insurance do research first!). I didn’t go to the doctor until the end of my second trimester and I only went to a total of 3 appointments before my scheduled C Section at the hospital. I am writing all of this today because I am now in the middle of my second pregnancy and I am doing everything completely different. I want to share with you what I feel I did wrong the first time around so that maybe I can help prevent someone else from making the same mistakes that I made.

1. Pick the right hospital for you! This might sound silly, but do the research about the facility that you want to have your child at. Check with the hospital and ask for a walk through of the maternity ward. Most hospitals offer this service on certain days and have set times, but it can help you to see where your child will be born. This relieves a lot of worry from your mind because you will know that a good staff will be taking care of you and your family. Also consider if you want to find a facility that has a NICU unit. If you have a high risk pregnancy or fear that you might have a high risk pregnancy you will want to make sure that you have all of your bases covered. I currently have a high risk pregnancy due to underlying conditions and because of that I chose to make sure that I am going to a hospital that has a NICU unit as well as a great staff. The drive is a little farther away (about 30 minutes) versus other facilities here in town and in the next town over, but the one I chose I feel has the best facility for me,

2. Find the best possible doctor for you! Do your research and chose a doctor that delivers at the hospital you already chose to deliver your baby at. You do not need to go with the first doctor that is suggested to you. Everyone needs to find their own doctor; sometimes one doctor is great for you while another is great for someone else you know. This is something that was very important for me the second time around after realizing how terrible my doctor was so many years ago. If you have underlying conditions that may be affected by your pregnancy find a doctor that might specialize in cases like you. Doing this will help put your mind at ease and it will help you to be more confident in your doctor’s abilities.

3. Prep for the surgery. Prepping for the c section is something that might have to be different depending on your circumstances. If you are going in for a planned c section then you will want to have a game plan set in place. I did not have one when I went in for my c section and found myself all alone after surgery. This is not something that you want to happen to you. This time around my man will be in the room with me and both of our parents will be in the waiting area. Our doctors and nurses will know to come get them once we have been moved to the postpartum room. You will also want to discuss your options with your doctor about how the surgery will proceed. My first birth I was put completely under and this time around I plan to be awake. Decide with the help of your doctor which is the best option for you.

4. The actual surgery. Be prepared for anything. If you are going to be put under then know that you won’t feel anything or see anything. This does mean that you will miss hearing your little one’s first cries and you will have to wait even longer to see and hold your baby. If I knew what it was like to be awake I would warn you about that, but I don’t so maybe after I have my little bundle of joy I will be able to tell you what it is like. (I will admit that I have some worries about what it may or may not feel like.)

5. Hospital Recovery. This might seem self explanatory, but it really isn’t. For me it was an easy recovery though I know it isn’t always that way for many people. I was and walking that night though I was sore and had to move slowly. Due to the fact that I cannot swallow pills I cannot tell you exactly what concoction of medications and such was being pumped into me via my IV bag. This time around I do plan on paying a lot more attention to these things as to make sure I know that I am safe and that I am not given anything I shouldn’t be given.

I have also heard that many women and their children are kept in the hospital for 5-7 days after a C Section though this was not the case for me or my little one. We were both released after two full nights in the hospital. To me those two nights felt like they dragged on and on, but I was also in a room alone for most of the time since I was not keeping my child and my then boyfriend had work that he had to go to. One thing I do urge you is to not get off of your IV fluids too soon because they took me off too soon more than once and it was a bear to get a new IV line in me. (They had thought I was hydrated when I really was not.)

6. Coming Home. This is a part I feel very unsure about. My doctor was not that great and she didn’t follow up with me a single time after having my baby and I honestly do not remember anything they told me other than weight restrictions and to stay hydrated. Weight restrictions was not new to me as I cannot lift very much in general so I was not bothered by this, but you might be. Be prepared if you do normally do some “heavy” lifting around the house because you will need someone to be around to help you out. I have also heard from people that you should not be doing stairs after a c section. I admit that I did stairs. I lived up a flight of stairs in an apartment so I really did not have much of a choice though I also did not leave the apartment for a week after coming home.

Where I live now is down a flight of stairs and if changes need to be made for me after the surgery I will make them so that I am on the main floor of the house. I will have a few steps into the home, but those should not be a problem in my eyes. When your doctor tells you to stay hydrated he means it. I made the mistake of not realizing I was not staying hydrated and fainted in the grocery store a mere two weeks after coming home. (I was a bit of an over achiever, but no one also told me not to do it.) Take your time to heal when you get home. Have a support system and take care of your new bundle of joy while others care for the big things like cleaning the home, grocery shopping, and cooking.

7. Wound Care. While I am not a doctor you should always keep it clean. Take showers daily or if you don’t feel up to that at least use a clean wet wash cloth and soap to gently clean the incision. You don’t want it to get an infection. Also always listen to your doctor and follow any of the tips for wound care that they give you. This does mean be gentle to the incision, don’t move to fast or stretch your abdomen too much as you could hurt the incision.

8. Enjoy your baby! This in my book is the most important one. Take the time to enjoy your little one and the time you have at home with your family. You will never get this time again. I tell you this having given up my daughter. I think about all of those firsts that I missed with her and I cannot wait to have them with my little man. Every moment is precious and you will want to treasure them all. You can’t ever get those moments back once they have passed.

DadGear – Diaper Bags for Dads

November 21, 2015 by Ashley Leave a Comment

I received this product free in return for my honest opinion from DadGear.

More often than not people only think about baby products for the baby and for the mom; the dad is often forgotten in the mix. It is important that we do not forget to include dad in the mix. His role is just as important as the moms role and he deserves to know that his role is important. Some dads aren’t crazy active in their child’s life, but that is not going to be the case with my boyfriend. He plans to play a very active role in his son’s life just like his father played an important role in his life.

DadGear – Diaper Bags for dads

It is because of all of this that I eagerly said yes to an opportunity to review DadGear – Diaper Bags for dads. To me these are the coolest thing ever! Men don’t want to carry around a big diaper bag like women carry. Those bags are just too girly and not masculine enough. A diaper bag that is a backpack or a messenger bag is the best invention ever made for men. Instead of picking out a DadGear diaper bag myself I let my man pick out which one was the right one for him. I was guessing that he would want a messenger bag due to his desire to carry our child on his back, but I was wrong. It was a good thing I did not make the decision for him.

After careful consideration he chose the Backpack Diaper Bag Graphic Classic Rock; to say that I was not really surprised is an understatement. One of his loves is music. He writes and records his own music and I know that he plans on sharing his love for music with our little boy. What a great way to get that started. I will be honest we had not looked into the specifics of the bag before we got it so we were like children on Christmas morning. Our eyes were huge and we ooohed and ahhed over every little detail in this bag. Just by looking at the front of this bag you would never suspect all of the features that come packed in this bag.

The first feature that we came across was the baby wipes window in the front of the bag. It has a simple velcro closure that we love. DadGear states that most major brands travel wipe packages will fit in this window. We find this to be great news because you always want ease of access to the most necessary items while on the road. My second favorite feature is their diaper hammock that they have at the top of the backpack. If I really pack the diapers in I could fit a good dozen diapers into the hammock. I like the hammock for the same reasons that I love the baby wipes window because those are the two items that will get the most use in the diaper bag while on the go. Having the diaper hammock right on top means that the diapers will never get buried in the bag and we will never need to dig and hunt for them.

Be the coolest dad on the block!

The bag comes with its own changing pad so that there is no need to hunt down one and hope that it will fit well in the diaper bag that you use. This one is made to fit in the bag and is big enough when laid out to fit a large baby and even a toddler on it without problem. In addition to that on both sides of the bag you can find stroller straps that attach the backpack to the handle of the stroller or if you are feeling adventurous they can also be attached to the handle of a cart at the store.

This diaper bag is a huge hit. I can’t praise it enough. It looks like it is built sturdy enough that it will stand up the test of time with this little one. I know my man cannot wait to use this bag when our precious little boy arrives. Until then it will await his arrival slowly getting stocked full of goodies for our bundle of joy. It might even end up being the bag that we pack little man’s hospital necessities in for his arrival in the new year.

DadGear was also awesome enough to provide us with a coupon code for you all! This means that you can save big money on a DadGear diaper bag for the man in your life just in time for the holidays!

Save 15% with the code pash15 at checkout on DadGear.com!!

Public School Versus Home School – Which Option is Best for my Family

November 20, 2015 by Ashley Leave a Comment

Yes, I am already starting this conversation even though my little man is still in the womb. The number of home schooled children is rising on a regular basis and more families are opting to home school their children. Deciding which option is best for my child is not an easy decision nor is it one that I will take lightly. I want to list out some pro’s to both public school and homeschooling your children. My boyfriend and I already know that we will home school. He loved being home schooled and it works really well with me being a stay at home mom.

Public School

Pro’s

Both parent’s can have full time jobs.
Government regulated classwork.
Educated teachers with specialties
Electives in the middle school and above
Unlimited resources
Socializing on a daily basis.
After school activities

Home School

Pro’s

One on one time with your child.
You set the pace for your child.
Find your child’s best learning technique.
Creative learning and teaching.
Experiment with fun field trips.
Schooling is generally cheaper.
No Busy work or need to repeat school work as much.
No homework to complete.

These are just a few reasons as to why both public schooling and home schooling are good for children. Each family will see different reasons that one fits them better than the other, but neither is right or wrong. You get to choose and I honestly believe that you should also let your child voice their option once they are old enough to understand what their options are. If my child asks for public school while I am home schooling him I will consider all options and we will discuss the options as a family.

Here is an infographic that compares the two

Are you a Public School or Home School Parent?

Making My Life Easier with The Baby Pallet

November 17, 2015 by Ashley Leave a Comment

Some days I feel like I am still in shock over being pregnant with this amazing little boy and when I feel that way the panic sets in. I want everything to be perfect for my little boy and that means that I want to be able to keep him safe on the go. I am not a big fan of setting a baby or toddler down on the bare floor or the carpet because I never can guarantee that it is clean enough for my baby. That is why I have been looking into options for use while I am on the go. During my hunt for just the right product I came across The Baby Pallet. It is what I was looking for, something portable, lightweight, and small enough to really travel with. So, what is The Baby Pallet? I’ll tell you all about it.

What is The Baby Pallet

The Baby Pallet is a versatile product made for both the child and caregiver. It is an all-in-one indoor/outdoor portable mat that features two different sides. The first side is plush and meant for play time for your baby or toddler while the flip side contains a durable waterproof side and in the middle there is a layer of foam to help it keep its shape and keeps your little one safe and comfortable.

Why I Love The Baby Pallet

I love The Baby Pallet because it is so versatile. Being handicapped and having weight restrictions as well as issues having to do with comfort it means that I really want my little boy to be comfortable. Some may think that I am overly concerned, but I don’t think I am over thinking things. My little boy has a 50/50 chance of inheriting CMT from me and when he is little I know that he won’t have a voice to tell me exactly what he is thinking or feeling and because of that I want to think ahead for him. This mat will add just enough protection for him from hard surfaces and that is a great thing for me.

Like in the picture above I would want to put him on The Baby Pallet instead of on the grass though my reasoning is because I have a mild allergy to grass and I wouldn’t want his sensitive skin affected by the rough itchy grass. The mat would also create a barrier from the ground when it is slightly damp. All I would have to do is put the waterproof side down and it will help keep baby nice and dry from the wet ground.

The Baby Pallet Bath — Photo Copyright The Baby Pallet

The versatility of The Baby Pallet is the final reason why I love this mat. As shown above it is perfect for bath time. By turning the waterproof side up I would be able to use it next to the bath tub during bath time. It would give me something to kneel on while little man is getting his bath since I cannot kneel on the hard tile floor without something underneath me once bath time is over I can inch backward and he can be dried off on top of the mat instead of inside the bath tub.

Where to Find The Baby Pallet

You can find The Baby Pallet on their website though it isn’t officially being released until 2016. You can however reserve The Baby Pallet now so that you won’t have to wait even longer. Reserving The Baby Pallet could make for a great baby shower gift or Christmas gift as well. All you would have to do is give a card with a picture of the product in it to show the recipient what they will be getting. If you are unsure about doing that let me tell you that I would ecstatic to be gifted one of these even if I cannot get my hands on it quite yet.

The Baby Pallet Carry — Photo Copyright The Baby Pallet

November is National Adoption Month

November 16, 2015 by Ashley Leave a Comment

Since I made it public knowledge a year or so ago that I had given up a child for adoption you may have realized that the idea of adoption is something near and dear to my heart. It has since grown an even more important part of my life since getting involved with my best friend and companion who was adopted. Not only was he adopted, but his brother and sister were also adopted. Knowing so many people who were adopted just makes me realize how precious adoption really is. I find it amazing what people are willing to do for children in need and I want to share awareness about adoption with all of you.

November is National Adoption Month

November is National Adoption Month and I’m reaching out on behalf of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, AdoptUSKids, and the Ad Council to ask for your help in spreading the word about a new PSA campaign that encourages prospective parents to adopt older youth from foster care.

The theme for National Adoption Month is, “We Never Outgrow the Need for Family.” That’s because older children and youth still have many big milestones in their life they need a family for.

There are 415,000 children in the U.S. foster care system and 108,000 are waiting to be adopted. AdoptUSKids’ maintains a national photo listing service for children waiting to be adopted. Since the project launched in 2002, more than 25,000 children who were once photo listed on adoptuskids.org have been adopted and nearly 38,000 families have registered to adopt through the website. Nevertheless, older youth are disproportionately represented – approximately 41 percent of children and youth photo listed on adoptuskids.org are between 15 and 18 years old, but only 17 percent of those adopted have been in this age group.

Older youth and teens have lower adoption rates than younger children, and they often wait longer to be adopted. But no matter their age, all kids need a supportive, loving home and the teenage years are a critical period for growth. The new TV PSAs, which were created for the campaign probono, portray a dad giving advice to his teenage daughter after her first breakup, and a mom giving her son a haircut at home. The humorous, lighthearted scenarios aim to overcome fears adoptive parents may have regarding their own imperfections. The PSAs end with the tagline, “You don’t have to be perfect to be a perfect parent,” reassuring prospective parents that even if they are not ‘perfect’, they have the ability to provide the stability and security that older youth in foster care need and deserve.

The PSAs direct audiences to visit adoptuskids.org or to call 1-888-200-4005 (English) or 1-877-236-7831 (Spanish) to receive the latest information about the foster care system and the adoption process.

Why Older Youth?

All of us – and that includes older youth in foster care who are waiting to be adopted – need and want families throughout life to support us and to share important life events. Learning to drive a car, applying for higher education, and birthday and holiday celebrations are just a few examples of the times in life we need and want to share with family.
Older youth are over represented in the foster care population, as they generally wait longer to be adopted, and have lower overall adoption rates.
On adoptuskids.org, roughly 41 percent of the children and youth actively photo listed are between the ages of 15 and 18 years old. About 58 percent are male. (Most recent stats as of May 31, 2015)
Families who adopt older youth, are providing them with the support and stability of a family during a critical period of normal adolescent concerns and additional self-identity issues.

Some of the Misconceptions about Adoption from Foster Care:

Adoption is expensive. Unlike the private adoption of an infant or adopting internationally, there are virtually no costs associated with adoption from the US child welfare system. In addition, the vast majority of youth adopted from foster care are also eligible for monthly adoption assistance up to the level of the foster care rate.
You have to be married. You do not have to be married to adopt in most states. Many children have been very successfully adopted by single parents. Single-parent families accounted for 29 percent of all adoptions from foster care in 2014 (AFCARS).
You have to have a college degree. Having a high school diploma or college education is not required. What is important is that you are stable, flexible, and compassionate, and that you have a good sense of humor. Most importantly, you must have the support and commitment to raise a child and to be there for him throughout his life.
You have to own a home and each child has to have their own room. You can rent your home or live in an apartment or a mobile home so long as your living situation is a stable one.
You have to be of child-bearing age to adopt. Experienced parents and empty-nesters are encouraged to adopt. In most instances, you’re eligible to adopt regardless of age, income, marital status or sexual orientation.
You can only adopt a child who is the same race and ethnicity as you. Federal law prohibits the delay or denial of an adoptive placement based on the race or ethnicity of a child in U.S. foster care and the prospective parent or parents who are seeking to adopt them. The only exception to this law is the adoption of Native American children where special considerations apply.
You can’t adopt if you’re in the military. Military families stationed overseas and within the U.S. are eligible to adopt children from the U.S. foster care system.